more reflection...

so I thought I had it down....fierce conversation and such.  you do know that I would rather cut my arm off than confront anyone.  I rationalize that it is OK to lose a friendship rather than confront.  I have always been the peacekeeper - we don't do that....that confronting thing.  It's much better to stuff your anger and let it eat away at you. 

Here's what happened....

I have been working on a poster project for work, based on an EBP in nursing.  I chose the CAM tool for delirium.  Now I have been printing journal articles, reading them, highlighting the stuff I want to present, spending a lot of my spare time on this project.  I had the poster pretty much completed when I asked our CNS in psych if she had any graphics I could add.  Well - she got really excited about my poster (that I had been working on for ~6 weeks) and said things like "I want to add....", and "we should put in....".  I was stunned!  but rather than using my fierce conversation skills, I meekly (I know, me meek!!) said I'd "see if it would fit on the poster" and I would "look into it".  Inside I was feeling threatened - I wanted to just give up on the project.


I submitted the poster this morning.  She called me in the afternoon asking how "our" project was coming along.   We had a conversation.  


Here's what happened....

I went to the CNS asking for help.  She was excited that a nurse was presenting psych stuff and was eager to help.  She offered suggestions she thought would really help my project.  I didn't object so she thought we were a team.  When she found out I had submitted the poster without sharing with her, she was hurt.  We had a conversation.




So....here I've been thinking about how to make this right.  You do know that we have "do-overs" in life?  You just say - "remember when ________?  Well, I want a do-over".  and you make it right.  I will make it right.  I really value our friendship.


on a side note....for my creative goal I am painting a Koi a day for seven days.  


they don't look quite like fish yet.....